Cataract Capital of the World

It’s a sunny beautiful Sunday morning in Florida. This is the time bicycle clubs are out in droves and motorists are supposed to SHARE THE ROAD. You guys choose to ride your bikes down narrow, two lane, windy roads in a big clump clogging up traffic and you want ME to break the law by crossing the double yellow line into oncoming traffic to pass you OR travel behind you at 10 MPH in 45 MPH zone. This is wrong. If you want to “share the road” then get a bike that goes 45 MPH. At that point I’d be happy to share the road. I might even beep and wave. But until you get that operation that makes you bike faster than the million dollar man — GET OFF THE ROAD!

At the very least, you should use roads where there’s room for motorist to safely go around your clump. Or use bike lanes. And speaking of bike lanes, would you mind sharing the bike lane with ME? NO! Of course not. I was making a delivery in St. Pete and pulled on the side of the road, in the bike lane, and a group of bikers came by and cursed me to high heaven. Right back at ya pal.

Not only do you take your own life in your hands but you put us all at risk. Plus, we live in the cataract capital of the world who now drive with their cell phones in the car. Do you really want to share the road with these people?????

Pinellas County spent millions of dollars building a very nice, very safe trail for you. It’s 38.2 miles long. They also built extension trails all over the county so you wouldn’t clog our roads. Why don’t you use them? Maybe it’s because you don’t want to share the trail with walker and joggers. Do they go too slow and annoy you? Awh.

And don’t get me started on the getups. What’s with the shirts with all the logos? You’re not a race car driver and no company is sponsoring you to bike to Sunday brunch to drink Mimosas and Bloody Mary’s.  And the bike shorts?!? Come on. There’s NOTHING attractive about bike shorts on ANYONE!

So please, keep us all safe and happy. Put on some real clothes and UBER to Sunday Brunch.



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